Author: streetmadonna

late. I stayed at eddie’s company holiday party later than I thought I would. I also thought it would be difficult and emotional to see everyone, but I was wrong about everything. nothing difficult about it, unless you have a hard time dealing with fun times, hugs, and laughs. and well, I used to but…

I still haven’t gone grocery shopping. it’s been months. well, actually going to the grocery store—It’s been years. what i mean is I haven’t placed a whole foods order nor stocked up the fridge in months. the shelves are sad. but I cooked today. I found some good meats and vegetables in the freezer. eventually…

I wasn’t going to write tonight because it’s late and I have to work in the morning, but i’m dedicated to you. just got back from my holiday dinner with bea and cj. it was supposed to be an early night for me, but i should have known better. we had oysters, good food, fine…

Tonight I loved where I live. Skyline. Shorts in December. Walk to brewery. Friends with bartenders. chasing a dream. Watched shawanna do her stand-up comedy thing tonight. She killed it. A huge relief because I had no idea if i was going to like her jokes or not. she was dope. She performed at two…

finally got this site fixed. Fiverr came through with all the cache fixes, but I never asked about the timestamping. I’ll just do it manually. where did the weekend go. Saturday was a blessed day. Went running for the first time in like ten years. Six miles, but they were slow. In elementary school, the…

it’s late. I wish I could add a timestamp on this blog template. there must be a way, I better ask a fiverr. lentil and taz took me to cosm tonight for a documentary screening. that place is cool. the massive screen was experiential and the venue itself made me want to party. but the…

today was a good day! work was chill and maybe someone would consider me a good boss? also got into the gym for the first time in a billion years. did the bare minimum though; stared in the mirror, 3 sets of 12, nothing more. but I was there. I got on the scale. I…

happy 12th anniversary. Twelve years ago today I had my first date with eddie. We went to the cool sushi place in the arts district before the arts district was even the arts district where he told me stories about shredding ramps in San Jose, slaving it for his old boss on big movies, and…

life is moving. went to polina’s birthday party tonight. she looked beautiful. it’s always nice to see everyone, but it still felt sad. sometimes I forget that they are grieving too. everybody loved eddie. people ask me how i’m doing, what i’ve been up to, how i’ve been sleeping, and am I eating enough. I…

long story short. I went to eddie’s and my favorite sushi place for dinner tonight. party of one. according to the trusty swarm app, the last time we went there was july 9. they were shocked when I told them about his passing. yoey said, “he looked perfect last time I saw him.” indeed. it…

worked late so the night got away. sipped wine (with ice in it) and talked on the phone with cj. like a normal, healthy girl with friends. today I went to the eyebrow studio for my annual brow touch-up. another normal, healthy girl thing of me to do. I can do that, but I can’t…

it feels good to be back in la. The only person bummed about it is Niko. She loved the quiet vastness of Elk Grove so much. Nevertheless, she did great on the flight home. No fussing and no clawing like on the way there. She actually did better than me. Admittedly, I had a spontaneous…

Finally got to explore a little bit of Sacramento. Went to the best farmers market in California (third best in the country). It’s the best because it’s big, has everything every other farmers market has to offer plus a tarot card reader, and vendors I wish were available in la. Frenchy gourmet yogurt was a…

i am still in Sacramento. Elk Grove really. I still have not seen much of the city mostly because I’ve been spending my time here sleeping. Maybe because it’s so quiet and peaceful. Maybe because I’m being completely taken care of by my family. Maybe because i simply need to recover. AND BE ALONE. But…

Happy thanksgiving. I am in a city I’ve never been. Sacramento. It’s nice here. Quiet. The house is huge. So quiet. Haven’t seen much of the city at all since my flight got in at night. The only place we went was in n out. Wasn’t an la crowd that’s for sure. They say people…