Author: streetmadonna

so much can change in so little time. Checked my camera roll to see where I was and what was happening around this time last year. Eddie and I had just gotten the new, ultralight wheelchair. And we went to Catalina. We never really traveled or took trips together, so it was a big deal….

today was a day of good neighbors. Sunny’s mom stopped by after the community event for some wine and chit chat. Sent her home all nice and buzzy. later on, a different neighbor stopped by for Chit chat and laughs. Sent her home with some buzz too. I talked about the feeling of being free…

i felt pretty lousy today with all the coughing. Lungz is toasts. Canceled all my work meetings and dinner plans. I did some light cardio on the pelo bike to get some blood pumping through the system. a country music ride for the first time. Of course Chris Stapleton. It was nice and I felt…

happy Sunday night. My current status is that I’m recovering from a lower respiratory tract infection, overdosing on a certain grape-flavored cough syrup, late night slumber parties, sad news from siblings, and caffeine withdrawal. I’m so exhausted I can’t write more. 9:42 pm.

this is what I get for acting all bad in my doggles and thinking that I’m crushing the grief game. I had one of the hardest days in a long time. many tears. What happened to me. a message came through from eddie. The delivery was loud and clear (i heard his voice), but the…

people ask how I’m doing all the time. Usually it’s the older people who are most pleasantly surprised to hear that I am doing great. Because They wouldn’t be able to hang, take the shots, see the sun come up. Wouldn’t want to be in my shoes. We never felt our age. And I still…

I wrote a blog post for tonight, but I deleted it because it wasn’t about love. It was about hate! Basically, a few years ago, I found out that my one enemy died. And my immediate response was, “bitches get stitches.” But now I retract that. And I’m grateful for whatever her energy is doing…

How is things are. It’s February now and we can probably all agree that time is flying. Because we are having fun! So…I still have not renewed my lease. I responded to their email asking them to remove eddie And his information from the paperwork (and i told them why), and to send me a…

i’m operating on very little sleep after new year’s celebrations. Someone said it’s like I’m reliving my college days—late night drinking, staying up chatting, watching videos, laughing, tasting. Until the sun comes up. Thankfully i have no o-chem classes and roommates to worry about now. Just a job. This is what I went for. Thinking…

happy lunar new year’s eve. not sure if we’re supposed to be partying tonight and popping those popper things at midnight? or is everyone celebrating tomorrow. I asked my mom and she thought it was next week. i’m in the spirit though. where ever the east winds take me—the land of laughter and prosperity. snakes…

My lease renewal offer came in. The email was addressed to both me and eddie. And his name is still on the lease. Of course they were informed, and they should know better but they’re corporate. Pounds fist. And want their money. They raised the rent and raised the parking by nearly 50%. we were…

This weekend i realized that I’ve been so wrapped up in all my emotional and physical stuff that I haven’t really taken time to connect with my consciousness. I mean I feel pretty aligned with the universe already, especially with all the golden love that’s been shared around me recently—what more do i need? I…

you guys, good news and further confirmation that love and kindness Is the way. Neighbor update. Niko and I were bumpin’ Richie Hawtin techno sets all night. Only because we wanted to cover up the sound of the upstairs neighbors’ footsteps with the sounds of unz unz. At around 11:45 pm, the boyfriend of the…

happy friday. i’m taking an easy day at work. today is five months since eddie’s passing. I have the best team holding down the fort so I was able to step away to go to the cemetery. I was really unprepared for the visit though. I didn’t think I needed to take anything, but turns…

today was a beautiful day. Every aspect of my life brought me joy. Is it weird to be laughing so much? I’m not really in a writing mood though because there is a lot of stuff going on in my head, heart, stomach, and plantar fasciae right now. Nothing bad. transmitting love Place index and…

feeling very good tonight. I had dinner with cj where the restaurant was cute and loud. trendy la. at our table…nothing but real talk, no judgment, all love. and that caramel sauce. two funny things today: 1. I decided to extend my arm out over the balcony railing while holding a peanut in hopes of…

i’m back to playing games. don’t hate. I used to play wordle and the other new york times word games (on the app) every single day for years. the crossword and the spelling bee game kept me occupied for hours. they are what kept me distracted when I sat by eddie’s side through hundreds of…

I had forgotten about all the thank you cards that I wanted to write. this is a task that I thought I could have completed by the end of november 2024. then I extended the deadline to new year’s eve. but here we are. it is not an easy job—I’m trying to write real good…

I haven’t been sleeping on life. times are being had. twice—déjà vu. I hope you had a good weekend. i’ve been feeling the love, which has always been what fuels me through the fog of grief and the beautiful madness of life. and this love came to me over the weekend in many forms: fried…

i didn’t drink any coffee or espresso today. But I had multiple matcha lattes. Lotta lattes. Muchas matchas, etc. I fell asleep after dinner. my neighbor treated me to sushi. Dinner was his idea. Sushi was my idea. Turns out he doesn’t eat raw fish. He also doesn’t eat ramen. Dude is living in the…